tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-84382399194752486112024-02-19T02:17:36.992-06:00Mothballs Don't Cover StinkSnarky advice from a Human Resources Professional.Unknownnoreply@blogger.comBlogger34125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8438239919475248611.post-63617727746404170692013-02-17T15:12:00.001-06:002013-02-17T15:12:46.690-06:00H.R. Stories: Unemployment<div style="text-align: center;"><br />
<iframe allowfullscreen="" frameborder="0" height="270" src="http://www.youtube.com/embed/pDavfHN0g2c" width="480"></iframe></div>Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8438239919475248611.post-66080312902720879452013-02-17T14:40:00.001-06:002013-02-17T14:40:43.431-06:00HR Stories: Never Coming Back<div style="text-align: center;"><br />
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<iframe allowfullscreen="" frameborder="0" height="270" src="http://www.youtube.com/embed/4T3WbHjrfGs" width="480"></iframe></div>Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8438239919475248611.post-66059152014714070492013-02-17T14:35:00.001-06:002013-02-17T14:39:07.197-06:00HR Stories: How Not To Get Hired [Revised Edition]<div style="text-align: center;">
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<iframe allowfullscreen="" frameborder="0" height="270" src="http://www.youtube.com/embed/gGxrk6Ow7Sk" width="480"></iframe></div>
Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8438239919475248611.post-38087886158500170162012-01-07T14:14:00.000-06:002012-01-07T14:16:24.209-06:00HR Corollary #1A couple years ago, my (now former) assistant set up an interview for her sister-in law (Sh) for a job opening. Sh didn't show up for the interview. When my assistant asked her why she hadn't come in, Sh said that she didn't have anything to wear that she thought was appropriate. Of course, that shouldn't have stopped her from calling to cancel or reschedule her appointment, but it had.<br />
<br />
Sh filled out an application a few weeks ago. I couldn't remember why she had not shown for her interview, but after talking to my former assistant I decided to consider her for an opening I had. Sh was very persistent on following up almost every day to see if I'd made a decision on hiring her. I told her that with the holidays, I wasn't going to make any hiring decisions until after the first of the year. I said that I would call her after January 3rd.<br />
<br />
On January 4th, she sent my former assistant's 16 year old son in to check on the status of my hiring decision. This irritated me quite a bit. I told him to tell Sh that I would be calling her soon.<br />
<br />
Despite my gut instinct, I offered Sh a part time position on January 5th. She agreed that she would come in for orientation on January 6th at 2pm and would start that evening.<br />
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Obviously, she didn't show for orientation or call.<br />
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<br />
<a href="http://farm8.staticflickr.com/7160/6653844159_fff4a3f9aa_o.jpg"><img style="display:block; margin:0px auto 10px; text-align:center;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 560px;" src="http://farm8.staticflickr.com/7160/6653844159_fff4a3f9aa_o.jpg" border="0" alt="" /></a>Unknownnoreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8438239919475248611.post-267534720648484112011-09-19T19:21:00.000-05:002011-09-19T19:21:12.856-05:00Hint For Job Seekers #15<a href="http://farm7.static.flickr.com/6156/6164631310_b5efaa82fa_o.jpg"><img alt="" border="0" src="http://farm7.static.flickr.com/6156/6164631310_b5efaa82fa_o.jpg" style="cursor: hand; cursor: pointer; float: right; margin: 10px 10px 10px 15px; width: 400px;" /></a>Years ago I worked behind the counter at a day labor staffing company. We got an order to send 2 guys to a town about 100 miles away to help unload a moving truck. Bobby was the driver of the car. Immediately after he got there, he called me to tell me the moving truck was not at the house. I called the driver who told me that he was just a few blocks away and for Bobby to wait. I call Bobby back and he told me that he wasn't waiting. The truck driver was ticked off and I couldn't get anyone else to take the job. I not only fired Bobby from working at our branch, but I had our corporate headquarters fire him nationwide for 2 years.<br />
<br />
So, Bobby came to my office today because he'd heard I had openings. Actually I had filled all my positions, but even if I had not, I would not offer Bobby a job. My normal approach in this situation would be to tell the applicant I had no intention of hiring that I would keep his application on file for future openings.<br />
<br />
But today I said this to Bobby: "You know, Bobby, you were an employee of mine 5 years ago. I sent you to a job to unload a truck in a town 2 hours away. You decided to leave before the truck driver got there even though I asked you to stay. You've proven yourself to be undependable to me. I can't imagine a situation that I would ever feel comfortable offering you a job."<br />
<br />
And then Bobby thanked me and left.Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8438239919475248611.post-20420529070990962002011-09-06T18:27:00.000-05:002011-09-06T18:30:57.540-05:00Hint For Job Seekers #14When I got to work, I found an email from the online dating site Zoosk inviting me to write a testimonial for one of my recent applicants. I haven't done it.
<a href="http://farm7.static.flickr.com/6208/6122188998_ee53a881f0_o.jpg"><img style="display:block; margin:0px auto 10px; text-align:center;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 530px;" src="http://farm7.static.flickr.com/6208/6122188998_ee53a881f0_o.jpg" border="0" alt="" /></a>Unknownnoreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8438239919475248611.post-5058692507464860902011-07-10T15:59:00.001-05:002011-07-10T15:59:30.997-05:00MoneyThis is based on an actual situation I was in while I worked behind the counter at a temporary day labor staffing company.<br />
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<iframe width="425" height="349" src="http://www.youtube.com/embed/c8eprOqkG0c" frameborder="0" allowfullscreen></iframe>Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8438239919475248611.post-91984128235397627702010-07-13T17:41:00.001-05:002010-07-13T17:42:20.911-05:00Hints For Job Seekers #13It's been a while since I last updated this blog. But today something happened that needed to have a hint graphic made. Someone came into the office today who'd filled out an application. He wanted to check to see if we had any openings. At the end of his visit, he pointed out to my Administrative Assistant that he drives a Mercedes. That made no impression on her because she doesn't care anything about cars. He then pointed out that he could identify that there was a Dodge Durango and Dodge Magnum in our parking lot.<br />
<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://farm5.static.flickr.com/4080/4791728024_ffbb13bf31_b.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="640" src="http://farm5.static.flickr.com/4080/4791728024_ffbb13bf31_b.jpg" width="595" /></a></div>Unknownnoreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8438239919475248611.post-18797042623393144752010-05-11T00:42:00.023-05:002010-05-11T00:42:00.213-05:00Days Of Wine & No RosesI recently saw a former employee of mine from back in the temp labor company days. He was notable for his alcoholism. We had tried to terminate his employment due to his getting drunk on the job site. He called and complained to the corporate office. We were told that we had to reinstate him because we could not make a legal determination of whether or not an employee was drunk. (Technically, if you want to write a person up for being drunk, you should write that the person appeared to be under the influence or impaired.)<br />
<br />
<a href="http://farm4.static.flickr.com/3592/4596760851_967b5f73d4_o.jpg"><img alt="" border="0" src="http://farm4.static.flickr.com/3592/4596760851_967b5f73d4_o.jpg" style="cursor: pointer; float: right; margin: 10px 10px 10px 15px; width: 300px;" /></a>So we reinstated him. He came to the office for dispatch not seeming to be under the influence. We sent him out on a job about 30 miles away with a crew of, maybe, a dozen workers to move office furniture. About an hour after he left our office, we got a call that he was drunk. My coworker had to go pick him up. She took him to a lab to do a blood alcohol test. He was 2 times over the legal limit. He still denied that he had been drinking, but we were allowed to terminate him for 3 years, I think. That's as long as our nationwide bans lasted.<br />
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The temp labor company was the sort of place that people who were looking for work would show up at the office each day at 5:30am and wait for assignments. We had a lot of transients work for us. My first summer with the company I was the only staff member. I spread the word that my workers would no longer be allowed to sit outside the branch office all day drinking alcohol. One of them complained that I didn't officially post this policy for everyone to read.<br />
<br />
During my solo days I was able to do a termination on a temp who had been suspended for being drunk and belligerent over a dozen times. He made the mistake of going to a job site smoking crack and taking a piss in the corner of the room he was working in. After I terminated him, his family came and picked him up and tried to help him. He was a sad case. Years before he had killed his brother by driving a car drunk.<br />
<br />
It was our company's unwritten policy that we would never send someone out to the job site who was drunk or on drugs. If they ended up drunk, then it must have happened on the way to the job site. That being said, we wouldn't look the other way if someone was noticeably impaired. But seasoned drunks and druggies could often hide their impairment. And the counter we were behind was tall and deep, so we could potentially be a few yards from our temp workers. <br />
<br />
Most of our temp workers were good workers. It showed a lot of dedication to be able to show up for possible dispatch each day at 5:30am not knowing if they would actually get to work that day. But most of those workers also had found that they couldn't wait longer than a day to get paid for the work they did, so they couldn't survive a so-called "real" job where they'd get paid every 2 weeks, or so.<br />
<br />
I would often think that my mom would never have imagined that I would be working in that sort of environment, let alone know the sorts of people I knew.Unknownnoreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8438239919475248611.post-64296598055946418402010-05-10T00:55:00.015-05:002010-05-10T00:55:00.775-05:00Hints For Job Seekers - #12<a href="http://farm4.static.flickr.com/3303/4590131960_ea27d67711_o.png"><img alt="" border="0" src="http://farm4.static.flickr.com/3303/4590131960_8cfc679c01.jpg" style="cursor: pointer; float: right; margin: 10px 10px 10px 15px; width: 382px;" /></a>I am the sort of person who tries to figure out what people do the things they do. Sometimes I can't. A couple of times we have had someone pick up an application only to bring it back a few days later to fill out in our office. We had a guy stop by our office a couple weeks ago to check on the status of his application. He'd filled out his app almost a year ago, so I gave him a new one to fill out. I told him that we had several openings. He drove away with the application.<br />
<br />
He returned 8 days later with the application. He hadn't filled it out during those 8 days, so he needed to fill it out inside our office. He came back half an hour from our closing time (5 pm). We generally stop people from filling them out in our office at 4 o'clock. But my assistant, S., left him do it. Her quitting time was at 4:30, but she was planning on staying until he finished the app. I told her to go on home.<br />
<br />
He also broke my assistant's stapler, which didn't get him any bonus points.Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8438239919475248611.post-57919424564064182912010-05-08T00:16:00.012-05:002010-05-08T00:16:00.557-05:00Hints For Job Seekers - #11It may seem like you need to be in constant contact with your friends and family. But you really should put your phone down when you are visiting a business that you'd like to work for. If your conversation is that important, then finish it before you come inside.<br />
<br />
<a href="http://farm5.static.flickr.com/4066/4585643270_fe351bc73a_o.png"><img style="display:block; margin:0px auto 10px; text-align:center;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 489px;" src="http://farm5.static.flickr.com/4066/4585643270_fe351bc73a_o.png" border="0" alt="" /></a>Unknownnoreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8438239919475248611.post-62586372321770187142010-05-07T00:23:00.000-05:002010-05-07T00:23:00.187-05:00Conversation With A Former Employee<span style="font-style: italic;">[The following is a repeat from a <a href="http://wothuman.blogspot.com/">blog of mine</a> on 11/23/2009.]</span><br />
<br />
A bit more than a 2 weeks ago, I hired a new employee. 4 hours into her second day, Ms. R decided to leave in the middle of her shift. Allegedly her daughter got sick and had to go to the hospital. An unfortunate side effect to working in Human Resources is that I have grown to doubt every story I'm given. You'd think that people wouldn't lie about their kid being in the hospital, but they do. They lie about lots of things.***<br />
<br />
So, Ms. R asked if I would consider rehiring her. I asked her why she hadn't called or stopped by to tell us what had caused her to disappear and stay away from work. Here is a synopsis of here reasons for not contacting us:<br />
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<a href="http://farm3.static.flickr.com/2687/4129178699_6b3bb3ab0c_o.png"><img style="margin: 0px auto 10px; display: block; text-align: center; cursor: pointer; width: 586px;" src="http://farm3.static.flickr.com/2687/4129178699_6b3bb3ab0c_o.png" alt="" border="0" /></a><br />
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I told her that under the circumstances that I would have a hard time justifying rehiring her. I asked her what she could do to reassure me that she wouldn't no call/no show again. Here's her response:<br />
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<a href="http://farm3.static.flickr.com/2794/4129225403_a607b7405c_o.png"><img style="margin: 0px auto 10px; display: block; text-align: center; cursor: pointer; width: 506px;" src="http://farm3.static.flickr.com/2794/4129225403_a607b7405c_o.png" alt="" border="0" /></a><br />
<br />
I ended our discussion after that and wished her a happy Thanksgiving. I told her she could reapply in 1 year. I wanted to give her this advice, though:<br />
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<a href="http://farm3.static.flickr.com/2486/4129114145_4237e6c50a_o.jpg"><img style="margin: 0px auto 10px; display: block; text-align: center; cursor: pointer; width: 506px;" src="http://farm3.static.flickr.com/2486/4129114145_4237e6c50a_o.jpg" alt="" border="0" /></a><br />
<br />
Or better yet, this advice:<br />
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<a href="http://farm3.static.flickr.com/2630/4129114443_b9a6fa890c_o.jpg"><img style="margin: 0px auto 10px; display: block; text-align: center; cursor: pointer; width: 506px;" src="http://farm3.static.flickr.com/2630/4129114443_b9a6fa890c_o.jpg" alt="" border="0" /></a><br />
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<span style="font-style: italic;">***I once had an employee call in because his father had died. A week later, his dad called wanting to talk to his son.<br />
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</span>Unknownnoreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8438239919475248611.post-75292965986646780192010-05-06T00:06:00.000-05:002010-05-06T00:06:00.264-05:00Phone Conversation<span style="font-style: italic;">[The following is a repeat from a <a href="http://wothuman.blogspot.com/">blog of mine</a> on 12/1/2009.]</span><br />
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<a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhVoQw19wjJZf6TAIm9qwBlNkhhh0b6rH1hMLxUCi99aKaoAKJiPpRNposI6OVSZywtfzQnEATlsfwh8g2E0ZW1gYQ1WN945PIfJHdeUvnoJxcJmVAC8QTxI5l3cmDBVvhfM_CfLeBrkUU/s1600/Untitled-1.png"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 287px; height: 400px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhVoQw19wjJZf6TAIm9qwBlNkhhh0b6rH1hMLxUCi99aKaoAKJiPpRNposI6OVSZywtfzQnEATlsfwh8g2E0ZW1gYQ1WN945PIfJHdeUvnoJxcJmVAC8QTxI5l3cmDBVvhfM_CfLeBrkUU/s400/Untitled-1.png" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5410446418574958498" /></a><br />
Today my assistant, Suzette, had the following conversation on the phone:<br />
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Suzette: How can I help you?<br />
<br />
Caller: Who have I called?<br />
<br />
S: "name of business"<br />
<br />
C: I don't know if this even is what I want.<br />
<br />
S: What can I do for you?<br />
<br />
C: I'm looking for part time work.<br />
<br />
S: Are you available for weekends?<br />
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C: I'm really only wanting 1 day a week for maybe an hour.<br />
<br />
S: We don't have anything like that open.<br />
<br />
C: I stay home with the kids. My husband works. But I'd just like to leave and work for about an hour. Do you have anything like that?<br />
<br />
S: No, we don't.<br />
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C: I have a Masters degree in Psychology. And I just don't know if being a janitor is for me.<br />
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S: If you want to be considered for openings, you'll have to fill out an application.<br />
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C: Where did I call again?<br />
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S: "name of business." Thanks for calling!Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8438239919475248611.post-86189010489312007092010-05-05T00:03:00.000-05:002010-05-05T00:03:00.425-05:00The World of H.R.<span style="font-style: italic;">[The following is a repeat from a <a href="http://wothuman.blogspot.com/">blog of mine</a> on 4/3/2010.]</span><br />
<br />
<a href="http://farm3.static.flickr.com/2709/4487771394_b6958dc516_o.png"><img alt="" border="0" src="http://farm3.static.flickr.com/2709/4487771394_b6958dc516_o.png" style="cursor: pointer; float: left; margin: 10px 10px 10px 0pt; width: 259px;" /></a>I had to spend a few days over the last couple weeks with my H.R. boss. Someone in one of my offices had filed a complaint with the State Human Rights Commission about an incident she alleged had happened. Of course I cannot divulge anything about the complaint or our investigation. But I will say that this was not an entry level Human Resources investigation. This was a post-graduate thesis level Human Resources investigation.<br />
<br />
It has been a strange couple of weeks at my H.R. office, and the above mentioned complaint was just the icing on the cake. I also had to deal with the following:<br />
<ol><li>A bunch of people quit at once.</li>
<li>I had to hire a bunch of people.</li>
<li>One person I hired didn't show for her orientation. My Gruff Boss had be call her to have her come in the next day. It was not a surprise that she only lasted about 2 days before her attendance was a problem. In the one week surrounding her employment, she presented a bunch of reasons she had to delay her start date and/or had to leave work early and/or had to miss work. She had an uncle who was going to have his leg amputated and she needed to be there. She had a toothache that required her to be at the Emergency Room for 2 solid days. And some others I've forgotten already.</li>
<li>We had people from our American Headquarters come and train us on the new software we would be using. I had been in our Regional Headquarters at the end of February to train on the software. However, the computer network had issues and the 2 days of training were a complete waste of time.</li>
<li>IT people from our American HQ invaded our office to install new stuff that would make it possible for our European Corporate <span style="font-style: italic;">Corporate </span>HQ to upload all payroll and billing information faster and more frequently.</li>
</ol>Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8438239919475248611.post-6549207087602452802010-04-29T00:40:00.002-05:002010-04-29T00:40:00.807-05:00Standards of Hiring<span style="font-style: italic;">[The following is a repeat from a <a href="http://wothuman.blogspot.com/">blog of mine</a> on 11/4/09.]</span><br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjT1ROg58Mmye0NCQyOehyQyKuVqds9-kQuKKmKKlgYwSTCEs5ICna_cY8iUbnuMg5uhfBB0ie76tnr6Gv3eCLoPmCpkGY3Tk1XhooTVsa2N8O24G7j6oltLDm7U_3MyY1qdfqFnRD6xRo/s1600-h/bsl020.jpg" onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}"><img alt="" border="0" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5400425613504018402" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjT1ROg58Mmye0NCQyOehyQyKuVqds9-kQuKKmKKlgYwSTCEs5ICna_cY8iUbnuMg5uhfBB0ie76tnr6Gv3eCLoPmCpkGY3Tk1XhooTVsa2N8O24G7j6oltLDm7U_3MyY1qdfqFnRD6xRo/s320/bsl020.jpg" style="cursor: pointer; float: right; height: 278px; margin: 0pt 0pt 10px 10px; width: 242px;" /></a><br />
As you all know, I have unusual people applying to work for my company. I have gotten about 750 applications so far this year. Unfortunately I would not say that most of them would be ones that I'd consider. I processed 7 applicants today that I'd gotten in the last week:<br />
<br />
<ul><li>2 that I'd terminated in a previous year for bogus SS #'s.</li>
<li>3 had felony convictions for forgery/robbery.</li>
<li>1 that I had a bad feeling about.</li>
<li>And the final one was acceptable.</li>
</ul><br />
<br />
I would like to find new janitors who have a steady work history, no criminal convictions, and have experience in the janitorial world. This is what I was looking for at the start of my day.<br />
<br />
By noon, my qualifications were they should have a clean criminal background and good work history.<br />
<br />
By 3pm, my qualifications were that they had no felonies and neither my assistant nor I could remember anything bad about the impression they made on us when they applied.<br />
<br />
I was able to set up 5 interviews for 2 full time positions.Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8438239919475248611.post-10018546966216151582010-04-28T00:58:00.004-05:002010-04-28T00:58:00.300-05:00Let's Race<span style="font-style: italic;">[The following is a repeat from a <a href="http://wothuman.blogspot.com/">blog of mine</a> on 2/3/2010.]</span><br />
<br />
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhuYCPxDHIsnXCvdNpKXFxUBcKXeL-EDst0Z7uxF6Me5h0t0cnk_0P9mN64cQAnlSSIb1G224BFr308lhDzUzUGeWv24EsDlLq2ySlIfbAFzhrCyeg-4Rb8mOGklyHk_Uh90IHgAx1vIic/s1600-h/yy.jpg" onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}"><img alt="" border="0" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5434193750926790370" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhuYCPxDHIsnXCvdNpKXFxUBcKXeL-EDst0Z7uxF6Me5h0t0cnk_0P9mN64cQAnlSSIb1G224BFr308lhDzUzUGeWv24EsDlLq2ySlIfbAFzhrCyeg-4Rb8mOGklyHk_Uh90IHgAx1vIic/s400/yy.jpg" style="cursor: pointer; float: left; height: 180px; margin: 0pt 10px 10px 0pt; width: 180px;" /></a><br />
United States businesses aren't supposed to ask their applicants or even employees to disclose their ethnic background. However, Equal Opportunity Employer regulations require companies to track that info. See my notes from a <a href="http://wothuman.blogspot.com/2009/12/new-hiring-pack.html">previous blog entry</a> for more detail about this stupid stuff.<br />
<br />
So, you can imagine my surprise today when I had a conference call with my corporate HR boss and he asked if the new employee (K) we were replacing an old employee (L) with was black. My Gruff Boss asked why. Corp HR boss said, "Well, I just wanted to see if we were replacing a black person with another black person.<br />
<br />
I told HR Boss that the old employee was actually white. We think he assumed she was black due to her name.<br />
<br />
I wish I had said to him that I hadn't determined what either employee's race was because that information couldn't be used to make HR decisions.Unknownnoreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8438239919475248611.post-72513028979899656212010-04-27T00:50:00.011-05:002010-04-27T00:50:00.129-05:00The New Hiring Pack<span style="font-style: italic;">[The following is a repeat from a <a href="http://wothuman.blogspot.com/">blog of mine</a> on 12/20/2009.]</span><br />
<br />
<a href="http://farm3.static.flickr.com/2596/4202001118_46a9d3d9ed.jpg"><img alt="" border="0" src="http://farm3.static.flickr.com/2596/4202001118_46a9d3d9ed.jpg" style="cursor: pointer; float: left; margin: 10px 10px 10px 0pt; width: 350px;" /></a>We got our new corporate mandated hiring pack. We counted up how many total pages are in it. This number also includes the insurance info, the corporate values glossy pamphlet, the take home handbook, and the safety manual. There are 96 pages for each new employee to enjoy.<br />
<br />
After the world's worst conference call (complete with stupid questions and idiots who didn't know how to mute their phones resulting in feedback), I called up my branches to make sure they understood what was going on.<br />
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They did understand. And then told me that they thought it was stupid and didn't make any sense. I reminded them of my HR mantra: "When you deal with HR, you need to leave common sense outside of the HR doorway."<br />
<br />
Here's a smidgen of the new HR policy and hiring pack:<br />
<br />
<ol><li>We cannot put anyone to work without ensuring that they have a clean criminal background</li>
<li>But we cannot have anyone sign the release to do the background check until after they have been offered employment</li>
<li>The release form states that they are only to give us their month and day of their birth, but not to give us their year of birth. (that reduces the chance of age discrimination)</li>
<li>We need the employee's complete birth date to do the background check and it won't be processed without the employee's year of birth</li>
<li>Our company is dedicated to being an Equal Opportunity Employer, and we have to track applicants' race</li>
<li>We can't ask an employee to disclose their race, but they can fill out an optional self-identification form</li>
<li>If they opt out of self-id, then we have to make a "best guess" as to what their race is</li>
<li>We may not actually see the applicant, but still have to determine their race.</li>
<li>We cannot use their last name when assigning them a race.</li>
</ol><br />
<span style="font-style: italic;">(By the way, according to the US government, a person can be considered to be Hispanic/Latino/Latina regardless of his or her ethnic background. You can be Hispanic/Latino/Latina if you culturally identify yourself with that group.<br />
<br />
Also, if one of your parents is Hispanic/Latino/Latina, then you are that race. If your parents are a combination of other races, you are multiracial in the eyes of the US government.)</span>Unknownnoreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8438239919475248611.post-871940889621474582010-04-26T20:19:00.001-05:002010-04-26T20:21:12.109-05:00Name's The Same<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiul5XWs5sEuX7LZZmQfzAZBzxPpyz8khGeit1HPUOBdnQ8bEFGUlZD3mKxIW4DB63VCJon-IkQJJPRHGEeUemJh4BxJ1PpsE6FCafO0NZOEJDVZqIEa_v228p0Fhyphenhyphen88aETjCW0xrFk8y8/s1600/97752508.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" height="240" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiul5XWs5sEuX7LZZmQfzAZBzxPpyz8khGeit1HPUOBdnQ8bEFGUlZD3mKxIW4DB63VCJon-IkQJJPRHGEeUemJh4BxJ1PpsE6FCafO0NZOEJDVZqIEa_v228p0Fhyphenhyphen88aETjCW0xrFk8y8/s320/97752508.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>An applicant came into our office who knew my assistant. I'll call him Billy Wilson (not his real name). My assistant, S., told me that she had known him for several years, had house sat for him, and that Billy was in school to get a law enforcement degree. S. said that Billy had worked for as a security guard. He sounded like a good candidate, but I had known someone by the name of Billy Wilson, who I would never hire for an opening. But because S. felt so strongly about him, I asked her to call him to get his birth date so I could have a background check done. He gave his birth date (I'll say in was 08/28/1967), and he came back to our office about half an hour later to make sure that I knew which Billy Wilson he was. When I saw S.'s friend, I realized it wasn't the same one I'd known and previously employed in another job. Confused eliminated.<br />
<br />
However, I really should have looked Billy up in the State Courts website before sending his info to the pay background check site. I found a Billy Edward Wilson born in the same year as S.'s friend. He also had the same address as S.'s friend. The website showed he was still "on paper" (on parole), so I looked up his information in the States Corrections Department website. Where were 3 Billy Wilson's listed; two of them were Billy Edward Wilson born in 1967. The first one I looked at was the one I had known. The second was S.'s friend. He is on parole for felony theft, so I can't hire him because he is not <a href="http://wiki.answers.com/Q/What_does_bondable_mean_on_a_job_application">bondable</a>.<br />
<br />
I wish this was an atypical situation.Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8438239919475248611.post-55002571503685404982010-04-26T00:32:00.003-05:002011-07-10T15:38:26.986-05:00H.R. Stories: Hiring Pack<span style="font-style: italic;">[The following is a repeat from a <a href="http://wothuman.blogspot.com/">blog of mine</a>.]</span><br />
<br />
This Xtranormal cartoon I made was based on 3 real conversations I had with 3 of my field HR assistants.<br />
<br />
<iframe width="425" height="349" src="http://www.youtube.com/embed/Pqw6j218dGE" frameborder="0" allowfullscreen></iframe><br />
<br />
Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8438239919475248611.post-66392385047275410972010-04-25T00:06:00.007-05:002010-04-25T00:06:00.224-05:00Hints For Job Seekers - #10 or Mothballs Don't Cover Stink<i>...or how this blog got its title.</i><br />
<br />
<a href="http://farm5.static.flickr.com/4008/4547889351_70806c538e_o.png"><img alt="" border="0" src="http://farm5.static.flickr.com/4008/4547889351_8fdab486b9.jpg" style="cursor: pointer; float: right; margin: 10px 10px 10px 15px; width: 409px;" /></a>I have a <a href="http://www.facebook.com/">Facebook®</a> profile. I often post comments of strange things that are happening to me at work as they happen. One day I was telling a story about a guy who had come into my office to drop off an application. He had a distinctive aroma of mothballs covering up body odor with underlying notes of marijuana. One of my FB friends who I'd gone to high school with, <i>M.</i>, made the comment that a good title of my non-existent book on Human Resources would be <i>Mothballs Don't Cover Stink</i>. It made me laugh so hard for the rest of my day that I created the new blog as soon as I got home. <i>(Sidebar note: One of the things that I like best about Facebook® is that I'm getting acquainted with people I went to high school with. <i>M.</i> is someone I didn't know very well at all in high school. It's my loss because M. makes me laugh when I read her comments.)</i> Another FB friend of mine even came up with lyrics to a blues song to commemorate the event.<br />
<br />
Anyway, this particular man was someone I'd interviewed for an opening I had 3 years ago. I decided back then not to hire him in part because of the wacky dance he did outside of my office after he finished his interview.<br />
<br />
He comes back every couple of months to "check on the status of his application" and to hit on my administrative assistant. My assistant, by the way, has nicknamed him <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bushwick_Bill">Bushwick Bill</a>. I converted his name to Bush<i>stink</i> Bill. I guess a helpful suggestion to "Bill" would be that if my assistant disappears as soon as you pull up to our office, it's not a good sign for your romantic future with her.Unknownnoreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8438239919475248611.post-84430983541912049822010-04-24T00:10:00.009-05:002011-07-10T15:31:49.902-05:00H.R. Stories - Quittin' TimeYet another reenactment of an actual conversation I had with a former employee...<br />
<br />
<iframe width="425" height="349" src="http://www.youtube.com/embed/e2arUleGbGI" frameborder="0" allowfullscreen></iframe>Unknownnoreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8438239919475248611.post-80922233522852451222010-04-23T00:51:00.000-05:002010-04-23T00:51:00.287-05:00Hints For Current Employees - #2<a href="http://farm5.static.flickr.com/4037/4529655166_229cda1ebc_o.jpg"><img alt="" border="0" src="http://farm5.static.flickr.com/4037/4529655166_01a919380d.jpg" style="cursor: pointer; float: right; margin: 10px 10px 10px 15px; width: 389px;" /></a>One of our supervisors, H, complained to me & our operations manager that an employee of hers had posted nasty stuff about her on Facebook®. We listened to H's complaints, but told her that there was nothing we could do about it because the employee, A, had posted these things from her home computer when she was off work. A's biggest error was that she was Facebook® "friends" with a relative of H.Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8438239919475248611.post-84097714409744126652010-04-22T00:26:00.001-05:002011-07-10T15:55:05.731-05:00Hints For Job Seekers - #9Maybe you would be surprised how many times a person in this circumstance comes back to reapply. I'm no longer surprised.<br />
<a href="http://farm3.static.flickr.com/2661/4113613174_46349887a8_o.jpg"><img alt="" border="0" src="http://farm3.static.flickr.com/2661/4113613174_46349887a8_o.jpg" style="cursor: pointer; display: block; margin: 0px auto 10px; text-align: center; width: 345px;" /></a>Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8438239919475248611.post-548653446906079532010-04-21T00:14:00.002-05:002011-07-10T15:54:01.033-05:00Hints For Job Seekers - #8<span style="font-style: italic;">[The following is a repeat from a <a href="http://wothuman.blogspot.com/">blog of mine</a> 11/30/09.]</span><br />
<br />
<a href="http://farm3.static.flickr.com/2680/4111053780_46ca9f3ac1_o.jpg"><img alt="" border="0" src="http://farm3.static.flickr.com/2680/4111053780_46ca9f3ac1_o.jpg" style="cursor: pointer; float: right; margin: 10px 10px 10px 15px; width: 394px;" /></a>Pretty close to a year and a half ago I woman in her 20's came into our office to fill out an application. After she finished, I talked to her a little bit. She noticed a picture I had of one of my dogs and she decided to tell me that she had dogs. Then she told me how she helped her 2 mixed breed dogs to mate. And she got on the floor to demonstrate what she did to help. <br />
<br />
My gruff boss happened to stop by my office to give me something at the moment the woman was on my floor. He didn't say a word and left.<br />
<br />
After she left, I told my gruff boss the whole story. He told me that he just thought she was some weird friend of mine.Unknownnoreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8438239919475248611.post-60344212087366007192010-04-20T00:12:00.003-05:002011-07-10T15:51:50.903-05:00Hints For Job Seekers - #7<span style="font-style: italic;">[The following is a repeat from a <a href="http://wothuman.blogspot.com/">blog of mine</a> 11/25/09.]</span><br />
<br />
<a href="http://farm3.static.flickr.com/2591/4113178771_8b3934b7b3_o.jpg"><img alt="" border="0" src="http://farm3.static.flickr.com/2591/4113178771_8b3934b7b3_o.jpg" style="cursor: pointer; float: left; margin: 10px 10px 10px 0pt; width: 391px;" /></a>I'm not going to hire PopeJohnDillinger, either.Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0